Whether it’s a friendship or a love relationship, it will never be perfect, no matter how hard you and your significant other or your friend try. Your partner has some bad habits, but you are definitely no exception. Many couples break up because they can’t admit their mistakes and they keep fighting until one of the partners wins the game. If you are trying to save your relationship or just make it a bit happier, here are four things you should avoid doing in your relationship.
1. Do Not Mind Read
Communication is what keeps relationships healthy, strong, and long. Your partner cannot read your mind, and therefore you will have to thoroughly explain things to them on a daily basis.
Don’t think that you know what your partner is thinking. Assuming is one of the worst things you can do in a relationship. Don’t be afraid to ask questions to gain clarity.
2. Do Not Play Hot Potato With Your Feelings.
You can’t throw your feelings at someone else and make them take responsibility. You must own your own emotions. Also, you have no say in your partners feelings. Meaning, you have no right to say how they should feel about something you may have done to upset them. You cannot dictate someone else’s feelings. You are only in charge of your own feelings. The only thing you are in charge of, when it comes to your partner’s feelings, is doing your part to help heal what you may have broken.
3. Do Not Aim To Win.
If you win a fight, then the relationship loses. Believe me when I say, no one wins if the relationship doesn’t win. Arguments aren’t meant to be won, they are meant to be resolved. That’s where the ability to communicate and compromise comes in.
4. Do Not Bottle Up Your Feelings.
This is something that I struggled with. I was not able to free myself of all of my feelings and emotions. I had to let go of my fear of being “that girl” that nags. Nags are called nags because they are not nice ways to communicate your feelings, not because you share them. When you leave your feelings and emotions bottled up, you are poisoning your mind. You are hurting yourself. Let go of those feelings. It’s not up to you how your partner receives your thoughts and how THEY process them. It’s only up to you to free your mind and heart.
Always remember that no relationship is perfect, because no person is perfect but your partner should be the number one person in your life to go through great efforts to make you happy, and vice versa.
Fix your wrongs. Love each other and make it a priority to praise the good things in your relationship and fix the mistakes because neglecting them will hurt you and your relationship.
Until next time…
– Coach V